Travel Diary: Day 1

Travel Diary: Billie Myers - Day One Pop diva reports from the deck of RSVP’s Caribbean Fantasy Vacation 02.27.07

By Duane Wells

She took the music biz and the charts by storm nearly six years ago with the smash single “Kiss The Rain” and now UK Native Billie Myers is back with the provocative chart-topping single “Just Sex”. This week the stingingly talented Myers becomes the first artist to take part in “Travel Diaries”, a new series of travel adventures documented and written by our favorite celebs as they occur from wherever they happen to be in the world. On February 25, Oscar Sunday, Billie Myers boarded RSVP Vacations Caribbean Fantasy Cruise where she had one very special Oscar Night experience that involved names like Manny Lehman, Kristine W. and Kimberly S.. Here’s Billie in her own delightful words to tell you all about it, one vodka cocktail at a time:

Billie Myers Travel Diary – RSVP Caribbean Fantasy Vacation Cruise (Day 1) All aboard …
…Given that the only vessel I’ve traveled by sea in has been more along the lines of a row boat, the sheer size of this ship is daunting!

But before I begin this diary it would be remiss of me not to confess that cruise preparation is a bitch! …I couldn’t make a decision to save my life, so I took the easy way out, and over packed. The poor baggage chap visibly blanched when he picked up my cases… I knew it was bad when American Airlines demanded $75 overweight charges on one case and $50 on the other! … At this point you should know I am only here for 3 FULL DAYS!

A Costco size box of Dramamine, four bikini’s, two rather fabulous long cocktail dresses for formal wear evening, shorts, jeans, skirts, tops of every variation, jewelry, water wings (I can’t swim), flip flops in every color, boots, hair dyer/diffuser and curl taming products, sun lotions and potions, more t-shirts and jeans …by now I think you get the idea.

…Of course, the most important part of my preparation process was a diet…the prospect of hanging out with 3,500 gay chaps is a sure fire motivation!

All aboard … Cruise virgins to the left.

1ST Raspberry, Vodka and seven-up…
…From the get go a code word was required for hotties…. Andrew and Kelly, my gorgeous cohorts in cruise-crime and I went though a few terms. I thought Pina Colada was cute. Clearly appalled, they gasped, instinctively slapped one hand across their lips and yelled, “too girly!” Needless to say I had failed my first test…they came up with the terms “ a shot of Jack”…. I thought we should add “ a 12 bottle box of Jack”, because I kid you not, some of the chiseled bodies sauntering by, defied definition.

2nd Raspberry, Vodka and seven-up…
Of course it rained as we departed. …However I was assured, by Andrew, this was a good luck sign, and not as I feared a precursor to the Titanic! What’s a girl to do? …. Stand in a corner and try to keep dry, or forego the hair and make- up and dance? …Well this one found James a strapping 6ft go-go dancer who just happened to be going commando in a pair of white shorts, that begged a “how wet is see through” contest! Ever obliging, I of course patted him down to transparent, and fended off his many admirers….

3rd Raspberry, Vodka and seven-up….
…. And then enters mixing royalty! Manny Lehman in all is buffed up glory. Given that I had never met him before, I begged to be introduced and then stammered my way through a gushing “hello…I’m a huge fan… that Brokeback Mountain remix is genius”. Clearly being cool is not my strong point! I have the thrill of performing with him on Tuesday and in all honesty I am panic stricken…but he’s turns out to be an absolute doll with a sense of rhythm directly from Puerto Rico!


4th Raspberry, Vodka and seven-up
No power nap for me, the Oscars were being shown via satellite at 8pm…. No one was going to miss the divine Ellen is all her glory. Although by now food was not so appealing to me, given that the boat was swaying and I was a smidge tidily, a quick dinner at one of the numerous restaurants was a must. Choices, choices, I don’t think I've seen so much food in one place ever!

Four hours of hysterical Oscar commentary kept us distracted from some of the agonizingly lackluster speeches. The highlight of the night was of course Jennifer Hudson winning …the hoots, screams, and standing ovation was raucous.

By 1 a.m. I had officially lost count of the number of raspberry, vodka and seven-ups I had downed. Whilst this might be hard to believe, I hardly ever drink, but the contagiousness of “what goes on at sea stays at sea” is hard to resist.

Now you would think that would be the end of a long day right? …. No, not when you have Kimberly S. spinning up a storm 3 decks up! ….Every time my feet would demand I sit my sorry ass down, she’d play another song that overrode my better judgment! And then just when I was about to leave the dance diva Kristine W. walked in and another drink had to be had! Honestly I am not sure what time I finally crawled into to bed… but whenever it was, all I know is I had fun!


Find out more about Billie Myers by visiting her website, www.billiemyers.com. And don't forget to check out her Top Ten Billboard single "Just Sex" which is burning up dance floors from coast to coast.